Wondering....

Sometimes I feel like in this day and age, it is taboo for a woman to admit that that they just want to be a wife and mother. Past generations told women that that was all they could ever want or expect to be. And then, I feel like my generation and future ones expect all women to want to have a career and to plan their lives in such a way that a traditional family and life has to be put on hold until they had accomplished something. I am not saying that women who have and want to do this are not right in doing so. I think it is wonderful that women have the opportunity to do anything they would dream of. I guess I am just trying to figure out when it stopped being OK for a girl to say she wants to grow up to get married, and have a baby. That sounds so trashy doesn't it? As if a girl should never admit that she would be content with that. I think it is sad that women who are willing to stay home and care for their families are no longer considered a valued part of our society. I even catch myself making fun of those women that do stay home. It is as if my brain is trained to think that they are less because they can and/or want to be home with their kids instead of working. Lets not forget, these people are working for free for 24 hours a day, doing menial tasks like diaper changing and cleaning toilets in between parenting. Yet, there are some people that want to do this. Shouldn't they be considered valuable, instead of being looked at as less of a person?

If being a stay at home parent were a lucrative career choice, would that be more valued and viewed as as a desirable life choice like being a doctor or lawyer? Most career choices are valued by how much time and work it involves to get there. Actually, many families DO have to work hard to allow one parent to be home with their children. Sacrifices have to be made.

Some people are not in a position to be a stay at home parent. Some families are not financially able to have a parent stay home. For most single moms and dads this option does not even exist, but what is wrong with WANTING that? That is what I am asking. Also, I think a big reason I am asking this question is because I am one of those people that are stuck in a place where this is not an option. For a lot of wives and mothers out there, including myself, we are burdened with the responsibilities of jobs outside the home and the majority of the work IN our homes. There is usually not a clear cut example of what is expected of us at home, but many of us put extra responsibilities on ourselves, and are then overwhelmed by them. As a society, how many husbands do we hear complaining because they do all the housework and don’t get enough help with the kids when their wives get home from work? Exactly. I’m sure they exist, but I can’t think of very many. Gender roles are defined very early in life, and once we take them on, it seems like we are stuck with them, even when we add extra things to our lives, such as jobs and community activities.

On a side note, I also believe stay at home dads are equally looked at in a negative light, which is ridiculous. If that is what works for their family, then don't judge. I didn't want to make this come across as if they don't exist, because I know they do!